09.03.04
I will never cease to be amazed at the perceptions that people have about pagans. I’ve personally walked the path of Shamanism for twenty-five years. In that time I have lost jobs because of my beliefs. I have been called horrible names and had my character called into question at the mention of the word “pagan”. I have had wild accusations thrown at me including many things that I find totally abhorrent. All presumed to be part of my religious practice. I find this particularly amusing, as I follow no modern day religion as such. I’m a pagan shaman. I follow the cycles of earth and the heavens. I follow the current of Spirit that flows through all things and is all things. I work with the animal totems and spirits. They infuse all aspects of my life. I believe we each have a piece of the creator in us and that piece deserves respect and recognition. I honor all paths and believe in using my gifts to help others. Mostly, I am a man who has a deep and profound connection to what I call Great Spirit, or Grandfather. Yet, as with so many other witches, druids, shamen, priests and priestesses, asatru, wiccans, faerie folk and all who fall into the category of pagan I am outcast from a largely Christian based society. The part that they will never understand is that I think their path is right too, for them anyway. It let’s me know where they are gonna be on Sunday. Kidding…just kidding.
My boss came in one day, bible in hand, and proceeded to ask me how I could prove reincarnation by the bible. I asked what that had to do with my job as a control room instructor for disc jockeys, but that didn’t slow them down much. After a repeating of the question I began…”Jesus laid in the ground for three days and rose again…Lazarus who was dead walked among the living when Christ called him forth… he who was once Paul was then Saul”…or the other way around, I get confused….anyway, it was at that point that they told me about the budget cuts and how they could only afford to keep the Pentecostal control room instructor.
Even my appearance gets me in trouble. I happen to wear all black clothing. As shocking as it may be, there is no other reason as I like it. If I liked blue that much I’d wear all blue. But no, in the eyes of society I HAVE to be making a statement. I have to be goth, or wiccan or satanic or some such other categorization. It couldn’t be that I’m simply unimaginative and stuck in a fashion rut. My wardrobe simply must mean that I have pledged my soul to the forces of darkness. There is also a medicine bag that hangs around my neck; it’s been there for fifteen years. Filled with objects that to me represent the strengths I want to show as a person, it has gotten its fair share of attention. “Hey man, is Jerry Garcia in there”, or, “who’s soul do you have trapped in there?” I usually answer, “The souls of people who ask what’s in the bag”. I know, bad shaman, but I get tired of it. I had one lady come up to my in a public park…take one look at my medicine bag and ask me if I was a good witch or a bad witch…an obvious reference to the wizard of oz…..i laughed and said, “oh silly girl, I’m not a witch at all…I’m a shaman….would you like a reading.” Surprisingly enough she took me up on it. I laid out cards for her on a picnic table. I wonder if she is still with that guy. Anyway, the last round went to the guy at the Mexican food place love. He always talks to us and after getting past the language barrier I told him what I did. He then asked about my medicine bag and the language thing came into play again…finally, I told him “it makes me strong”. He offered to arm wrestle me.
Then there is the other aspect for myself personally. I happen to also be an intuitive…a psychic. I think it is the only job that you can have that people want you to prove and perform the minute they hear what you do. I mention I’m a psychic and someone will invariably ask me to read them. Do people ask dishwashers to break from the conversation to do the dishes? Does everyone insist that the surgeon operate at the dinner table? No. They do not. No one asks the mechanic to overhaul a car over coffee, but you tell someone you are psychic and bam, reading time no matter where or when. I know…poor shaman, it’s sad really.
I understand that most people do not understand the difference between the fact that we don’t worship tress and rocks, but that we worship WITH the trees and rocks. Therefore it is our responsibility to teach them; to replace their ignorance and misunderstanding with knowledge. Is that not our unspoken creed anyway? To pass along the sacred knowledge that it may be preserved and spread to make a world that would be better for us all. How many of us are guilty of perpetuating the images that the rest of the world has about pagans? Do we wave our Athames a bit too casually? Do we get a charge out of throwing around pagan terms just to get a rise out of people? Too often pagans wish to not be a part of the very world that they claim to follow as their spiritual guide. We must be the ones to reach out in the spirit of kinship and acceptance. I have been drawn into and heard so much “Christian bashing” in pagan circles and so much arguing about traditions and “the right way to do things” that it makes all arguments of “them” not accepting “us” seem silly. How can we expect acceptance and religious/spiritual freedom if we are not willing to give it? It is the charge that I gladly accept, because I’m a good person…I’m a spiritual person….I’m a pagan and darn it, people like me…ok, good point, bad joke.
“Be the change you wish to see in the world.”… Ghandi
Let’s all start by gathering at the pagan pride picnic. Let’s put aside the differences of our traditions and our paths and for this day let them come together as a single set of footsteps….one heartbeat that will resound and reach forth from us all on this day as a call to harmony with all of our relations that walk this earth. Let us unite in pride and spirit to start a new day, a better day for all peoples of all paths everywhere.
May Grandfather and Grandmother bless you all
ShadowaHawk
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